Top Gear 04x05
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| style="font-size:111%;text-align:center;background:{{#switch: {{{Show}}} | #default = #C6C9FF | Angel = #5678AC | Buffy the Vampire Slayer = #5678AC | Entourage = #FBBC87 | Firefly = #fc9 | Home and Away = #F9BA5B | Stargate Atlantis = #7F8EB7 | Stargate SG-1 = #7F8EB7 | The 4400 = #B9D0E8 | The O.C. = #FFAA44 | The Simpsons = #FADA00 | Veronica Mars = #C0D883 | Sex and the City = #EAADEA | OldTG = #FFD700
}};" colspan="2" | “[04x05]” | |||||||
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<---  --->{{#if:<--- Jeremy crashes his Volvo --->|<--- Jeremy crashes his Volvo --->}} | |||||||||||||||||||||
| Episode no. | Series 4 Episode 5 | ||||||||||||||||||||
| Written by | {{{Writer}}} | ||||||||||||||||||||
| Music used | Go there | ||||||||||||||||||||
| Directed by | {{{Director}}} | ||||||||||||||||||||
| Guest stars | Jordan | ||||||||||||||||||||
| Photographed by | {{{Photographer}}} | ||||||||||||||||||||
| Production no. | 0405 | ||||||||||||||||||||
| Original airdate | June 6th, 2004 | ||||||||||||||||||||
| colspan="2" style="background:{{#switch: 4 | #default = #C6C9FF | Angel = #5678AC | Buffy the Vampire Slayer = #5678AC | Entourage = #FBBC87 | Firefly = #fc9 | Home and Away = #F9BA5B | Stargate Atlantis = #7F8EB7 | Stargate SG-1 = #7F8EB7 | The 4400 = #B9D0E8 | The O.C. = #FFAA44 | The Simpsons = #FADA00 | Veronica Mars = #C0D883 | Sex and the City = #EAADEA | OldTG = #FFD700
}};" | Series 4 episodes {{{Series list}}} | |||||||
}} {{#if:List of Top Gear Series 4 episodes| | |||||||||||||||||||||
| List of Top Gear Series 4 episodes
}} | |||||||||||||||||||||
Contents |
[edit] In this Episode
[edit] Challenge
The team are told to go and buy a road-legal car for less than £100.
They meet up at Toddington Services on the M1. Jeremy arrives first with 'two tonnes of Swedish magificence', a 2.8l V6 Volvo 760 GLE.
Next to arrive is May, with a G-reg Audi 80 1.8E, with which Jeremy is very impressed, as it's 'more modern' than the Volvo. Hammond then turns up in a Rover 416 GTi 16v, to the derision of the others. He proudly shows off the GTi badge but is put in his place when Jeremy points out the 'Rover' badge on the other side.
They are given their challenge (with 'an envelope and everything'). A return train ticket from London to Manchester costs £182. Their cars cost less than that, so they are to drive to Manchester United's stadium and back to the TG test track in Dunsfold, taking the M1 and the M6 toll.
After brimming their tanks, they set off. Jeremy marvels at the fact that their £100 cars are keeping up with the motorway traffic, James thinks his Audi is 'perfect', and Richard notes that, in it's day, the Rover 416 GTi was rubbish.
Later, Jeremy, having opened his electric sunshine roof, finds that Robbie Williams and his Volvo's stereo are not a good pairing, whilst Hammond is bored, as he hasn't got one at all. He makes up for it by singing various songs to himself. After he does 'If I were a Rich Man', Jeremy helpfully suggests 'If I were a Tall Man'.
Having tempted fate earlier, and also having roared off from the others, Jeremy ends up in a cloud of steam by the roadside thanks to an air-conditioning belt snapping.
With 'Jeremy's heap of junk fixed', they are soon at Old Trafford, where they turn round and set course for Dunsfold.
All three cars make it back to Surrey without difficulty.
[edit] News
They start with speed cameras, scoffing at the government denying that they are 'there to make money'. Alistair Darling, the then-Secretary of State for Transport, has announced that, instead of 3 points and a £60 fine for speeding, minor infractions will get only 2 points and a £60 fine, however, more 'heinous' offences will attract 4 points along with the fine. They note that under the previous system, to be banned one would have to attract 4 3-point fines, adding up to £240, Under the new system for minor offences, they would get 6 fines, making £360. Which is more.
As revenge, they mock Alistair Darling's eyebrows.
Next, they feature a new Italian police car, a Lamborghini Gallardo. Jeremy doesn't see the point, as 'it is impossible to commit a motoring offence in Italy!". James says that he has been stopped by the Italian police, as the fuel filler cap was open on the Aston Martin DB7 he had overtaken the police car with on a left-hand bend at 110mph, and it was 'spoiling the lines of the car'.
They show the £20,000 VW Eos, saying that they like VW coupes very much, and the £29,995 Chrysler 300c, which they like the look of, James thinks that they shouldn't make it too sporty.
James tells of an experiment where he compared Jeremy's and his 'Christian' driving styles, finding that the Christian way was actually faster, to mockery from the others.
Jeremy makes fun of Hammond for presenting Crufts, and says that Hammond is seeking to restore his lost dignity by buying a new car.
[edit] Review
Hammond takes a spin in a 1968 Dodge Charger 440 R/T, which he calls 'the greatest American car ever'. He loves the noise and the image. He thinks it's cooler than the Mustang because 'bad guys drive Chargers'.
However, it's still flawed. Hammond notes the drag-inducing rear windscreen and the gaping mouth's poor aerodynamics. The steering is woolly and the brakes are terrible. He finds that it'll barely fit on his garage.
He still says that he wants one, however, comparing it's James Dean to the Mustang's Marlon Brando. He's not happy with the classic car scene, though.
Back in the studio, Jeremy says he should buy a Challenger instead, because it was in Vanishing Point as opposed to the Charger in Bullitt.
To buy the Charger, Hammond will have to sell his 22 year old left-hand-drive 911, but that will still leave him £10,000 short, leading Jeremy to quip that 'you're going to have to open some supermarkets'.
[edit] Star In A Reasonably Priced Car
Jordan is the guest, and Jeremy attempts to convince her to buy a bright pink Aston Martin DB9 Volante. She laps in 1:52.
[edit] Studio segment
Hammond introduces the Rolls-Royce 100EX, that will become the Phantom Drophead. May makes some jokes about BMW's ownership of RR, and expresses approval of the V16 engine, which is optimised for smoothness.
[edit] Challenge
The next challenge for the £100 cars is the fuel economy on the Manchester run. The target is 30mpg, with one point added or subtracted appropriately per MPG.
- Jeremy's Volvo did 20 mpg and scores -10.
- James' Audi did 35 mpg, scoring 5.
- Richard's Rover did 23 mpg, scoring -7.
They are also tested on reliability, and a point is lost for every time the bonnet is lifted. Jeremy loses a point for his air-con belt snapping.
The cars then complete a lap in the hands of the Stig. The target is 1:50, and 1 point is gained for every second under and 1 point is lost for every second over the target.
- Richard's Rover: 1:42, scoring 8.
- James' Audi: 1:46, scoring 6.
- Jeremy's Volvo: 1:48, scoring 2.
The next test is braking. The Highway Code says that the stopping distance from 60mph is 60 yards. They will get one point for every yard they beat this by.
- James' Audi: Stops in 40 yards, scoring 20.
- Richard's Rover: Stops (just) in 48 yards, scoring 12.
- Jeremy's Volvo: Stops in 34 yards (to Jeremy's delight), scoring 26.
Next, each car loses a point for every electrical item that isn't working.
- Richard's Rover: -3 points.
- James' Audi: -4 points.
- Jeremy's Volvo: -12 points.
Finally, they must drive into a wall at 30mph. -10 points for a death, -5 for each broken bone and -1 for each blood injury.
- Richard scores 0
- James scores 0
- Jeremy scores -5, as he broke a bone in his hand, even though his speedo was not working and he hit the wall at 40mph, demolishing it in the process.
After the crashes, the Volvo is the only one that still runs.
To decide the winner, they gain a point for each pound they saved out of their original £100 budget.
Jeremy is on zero overall, James has 25 and Hammond has 10.
- James paid £75 for his Audi, giving him a final score of 50.
- Richard paid £80, giving him a final score of 30.
- Jeremy gleefully announces he paid only £1 for his Volvo, meaning he wins with a score of 99.
[edit] Review
Jeremy reviews two track-day cars, the Porsche 911 GT3RS and the Ferrari 360 CS. Jeremy consciously ignores the £50,000 price difference and also his natural inclination towards the Ferrari.
He finds that the Porsche's racing seats and the ride quality were terribly uncomfortable on the road, but on the smooth track the handling makes up for that.
The Ferrari then turns up, and Jeremy likes it very much, especially the noise and the 'Race' button. He says it's like a proper racing car.
In a drag race, the Porsche is quicker off the line, but the Ferrari reels it in to win. Racing around the track, Jeremy manages to overtake Luca Badoer, who is driving the Ferrari.
The Porsche is simply engineered, and the Ferrari has much electronic widgetry, which unusually, Jeremy prefers.
Back in the studio, Richard asks about price, and Jeremy still prefers the more expensive Ferrari.
The Stig sets a lap time in each:
- Ferrari 360CS: 1:22.3, placing it second on the board, behind the McLaren SLR.
- Porsche 911 GT3RS: 1:22.3, the same as the Ferrari.
